How to behave in this situation? There are girls who are literally ready for anything, just so that I pay attention to them. Girls are cute, kind, lovely, BUT, they (as they say) are not my type!
Do not think, I DO NOT boast, I do not need it. I'm not handsome, just charismatic, I guess.
I try not to pay attention to them, when I meet them I stick to the phone, in general, I ignore them in every possible way, but there is no effect. It comes to the point that for the sake of my attention they do something terrible with their appearance. Horror!
Frankly say that girl i don't like, my tongue does not turn, I'm afraid to offend. They also don’t get a smile, because they are very cute. Generally, how to tell a girl that I do not like her? Or what actions to apply?
Nowadays, more and more often it is girls who initiate acquaintances with guys and they insist on further relationships.
But what if the girl is not to your taste? How to say no, to remain friends without offending a good person to whom you are very pretty?
There are several options, but they do not always help young people who want to stop romantic relationships that have not yet begun, but are brewing. Standard phrases: "I'm too young," "you're beautiful, but I like others," and the like, will most likely anger a girl who is already in a romantic mood or, even worse, in love with you.
How to stay friends without offending a girl
- First thing do not agree to meetings and even more so give your number a girl who is not your type.
- Second don't postpone talking laterif you see that a person is carried away by you. How to understand that they don’t want to be friends with you, but want more: you have known each other for a long time, communicate, but communication annoys you with the fact that the girl constantly calls and tries to meet with you. Talk and dot all the "ANDs".
- Conversation. No need to feel sorry for the girl, look into the eyes, worrying that tears are about to flow. Talk calmly, you know that this is not your soul mate, tell me how it is. You nice and smart, beautiful and elegantbut you are not my type and I wouldn’t like to start a relationship that will not lead to marriage!
Another option, let's say, answer the girl, to the question "Why won't we succeed? ". No one wants to be used, much less a girl who is in love and wants to arrange her personal life. Phrase: "I do not want to offend youstarting a relationship in which I will only need sex from you, "acts sobering on romantics. Although, I dare say, there are ladies who are not averse to getting at least this from a guy they like.
Not all girls are the same, one can be offended by saying that she is not your type, the other will be offended if you are not satisfied with a relationship without obligations. Therefore, there is no solution to the problem that would become a lifesaver in this situation.
Most importantly, do not give a person hope, even if he is very sorry for him, do not smile or flirt if you do not need a relationship, and most importantly, do not agree to try to build love with someone you are unlikely to love.
Do I need to be the first to tell a girl that you like her
Of course, if a certain girl arouses your sympathy, and you hope for reciprocal feelings, then tell her about it, show in some way or hint. It is generally accepted that men often take the first step in expressing their feelings. Not all girls are ready to take the initiative in this regard, so even if you like a person who attracts you, you may not even know about it until you yourself indicate your position in relation to her.
It should be understood that many girls from childhood were brought up in such a way that it is unacceptable for them to be the first to show their sympathy to a guy. Perhaps she believes that this act will not put itself in the best light, because "decent girls are not imposed." It may be that she had a negative experience in her school years - she showed her sympathy, but did not get it in response. In any case, if you want to know exactly if you have a chance to build a relationship with this girl, you should make her understand that she is not indifferent to you. How best to do this, you can determine for yourself. Of course, the character of the girl, the duration of the meeting, and many other factors matter.
Moreover, it is important to remember that girls love determined guys, so even if she initially did not consider you as a potential partner, your recognition may make her look at you from a completely different perspective.
How to tell a girl about your feelings
When you are very afraid to admit
If you are afraid to admit your feelings and still can not do anything with this fear, then, apparently, you are completely not sure how exactly the girl treats you. In this case, you should get close to her in order to learn more about her, and understand what are your chances of being together. The process of rapprochement is better not to delay, so as not to move into the friend zone.
What you need to do for this:
- Be attentive to her - listen to what she is talking about, ask leading questions.
- Take an interest in what she does in her free time, what her mood is, whether everything is in order with her - be sympathetic.
- Try to cheer up her more often - with the help of jokes, smiles and so on.
- Show interest in her personality - what she likes and what not, what films she can recommend for watching and so on.
When she is your girlfriend
Remember, loving couples often form friendship unions - perhaps the same thing will happen in your case! Many girls secretly in love with their friends, but often try to overcome this feeling, fearing that it will be non-reciprocal and in the end they will lose each other. However, even if this is not so, your chances are very high, because if the girl is friends with you, then at least you are pleasant to her. You can start moving to the point by simply starting a conversation that she generally thinks about the friendship between a man and a woman, how frequent this is in her opinion, and how good couples are obtained as a result of drawing together such friends.
It is worth noting that in fact such unions are often stronger than others. Many people strike up relationships without really knowing each other, and then break up because of the “surprises” that have opened up to them. Friends, in turn, are, as a rule, already well aware of each other’s not best sides, and they have already entered into romantic relationships consciously.
When she loves another guy
The situation is rather complicated and with too harsh actions you can only do much harm. First, try to understand what kind of relationship binds the girl and her lover. If they are not a couple or he does not treat her very well in a relationship, because of which she suffers, then your chances are very high. Try to be near her as often as possible, showing your obvious advantages over the object of her sympathy. Be attentive to her, take an interest in her affairs, make surprises without hinting at a serious relationship. Most likely, if she will receive more attention from you than from the guy who originally interested her, her interest will be redirected to you.
When she said she likes me
In this case, the easiest way to act, because the girl has already given you a "green light". If you did not immediately orient, and did not admit reciprocal sympathy, then do not postpone this matter for later. Call her, write or invite to meet, admitting that you also like her a lot.
Compliments about her taste and figure
Every girl loves compliments, even if she does not admit it. Usually girls are attentive to the choice of their clothes, hairstyles, and you can pay her attention to the fact that you notice this and admire her taste. For example, you can say that she has a funny T-shirt, a very beautiful dress, shiny hair, cool jeans and the like. As a rule, girls like these words. Many representatives of the fair sex believe that they have a special eye color, and even if you do not even polish, still give the girl a compliment on this subject: "You have such a beautiful and interesting eye color." Make some comparison. If your eyes are green, then say that they have an emerald sheen, if blue - compare with the boundless sea, yellow - with the cat's eye, gray - with the alarming sky, in anticipation of the rain (specify that you like rain).
It is also important to note that many girls doubt their figure. however, your chosen one is happy with her, the confirmation of her thoughts will only please her. A very thin girl does not need to say: “Oh, you need to eat more, otherwise it will blow away”, instead say: “You are so fragile as Thumbelina! I like!". If a girl is inclined to be overweight, then on occasion, note that she has a perfect figure. If a girl often goes to the gym, say that this is noticeable, adding: "Probably the guys are turning their heads."
Flowers and commonplace amenities
Probably all girls love flowers, and if someone does not like bouquets, it is only because they prefer flowers in pots rather than cut flowers. Although someone on the contrary loves bouquets, not finding time and great traction in the move for domestic plants. However, most likely you will find out about this circumstance after handing the flowers, if you do not in passing take an interest in this in advance. Girls also love various goodies - find out about her tastes in person or in person, or by looking at a page on a social network (often you can determine by profile what exactly a person likes).
Write poems with a hint of love
If you do not have confidence in your own poetic abilities, then it is better to find the work of some classic - Asadov, Yesenin, Pushkin, Rozhdestvensky and so on. Let there be no more explicit declarations of love, but the topic should be close to that. You can send her the work by personal message in SMS or a social network, commenting that today you caught your eye and really liked it. At a minimum, the girl will consider that romance is not alien to you.
How to start dating?
Imagine a simple situation: you walk along the street, travel by public transport or make purchases in a store. And then you see HER - the girl of your dreams. Well, or just very pretty and pretty. What to do? How to be It is logical that the best solution would be to approach and speak with her, but how to do this?
Or, suppose, this is a work colleague, classmate or classmate, a common acquaintance ... In short, you see with enviable regularity, but what to do next is unclear.
Why do so many men have difficulty communicating with pretty girls? The reasons may be different. However, the most common are:
- Excessive shyness
- Negative experience
- Fear of rejection or ridicule
- Low self-esteem,
- The popularity of a sympathetic girl,
- Difference of social layers,
- Inability to approach a girl, because a lady is never alone.
Many items from the list above in one way or another indicate self-doubt. In order to cope with uncertainty, you need a long work on yourself. A visit to a male psychologist or psychotherapist will not be superfluous, but it is unlikely that a girl you like will wait a long time.
Therefore, you can use the tips below.
- If you feel very constrained, then you should still try to predict the moment when the girl will be left alone, or at least in the distance from everyone else. But you should not obsessively pursue her from a distance - this will cause undue tension and much faster will become an occasion for ridicule, if not the girl herself, then her surroundings.
- Often it simply does not seem possible to wait for the opportunity to find a girl alone. A good alternative would be to wait for the least number of people around her to come up and offer her a short walk away. And already away from people to start a conversation with her.
But what if you are not familiar and met for the first time? There is only one way out - to overcome your embarrassment and come up. But how to start dating? There are many recommended phrases that abound on the Internet. This and “Your mother does not need a son-in-law?”, And “They called from the heavenly office, they lost an angel, but I won’t tell anyone that I saw you” and many others. Do not use them.
Why so categorical? Everything is simple. If you, approaching a pretty girl, are initially not confident in yourself and flaunt it immediately noticeably. No need to seem like who you are not. This is very noticeable, from here quite aggressive and mocking answers are not uncommon. It also happens that a girl who thought a second ago something like “What a handsome young man” after such a phrase continues the thought is very unflattering.
Therefore, the first rule is be yourself. Yes, perhaps you are embarrassed, blushing, turning pale and stuttering. More sincerity and openness from the first minutes more likely to succeed.
Rule two - say what you think and feel. No hackneyed phrases. If a girl amazed with her beauty - just say, “Girl, you are very beautiful, can I meet you?” Firstly, in this case there are only two possible answers - either yes or no. Secondly, the girl will be very pleased to receive a sincere compliment. Thirdly, even if she refuses, remember: negative experience is also experience. Thus, you will learn how to at least overcome your embarrassment, which will help a lot in the future. And the more such approaches you take, the less stress will be with each subsequent.
Suppose a girl agrees to meet and leave her phone number - ask her not to put it off and sit in a cafe or take a walk. Even if there is no time for this, then you will show your interest.
Do not start calling or writing immediately - the abundance of attention from a stranger can not only alert, but also push him away. Wait at least until the evening.
You can and should ask general questions that will let you know about the girl’s mood, some events in her life, interests and hobbies.
You can’t ask questions on sexual topics, be rude, use extreme expression, crush, beg for addresses, be too annoying.
Observing these simple rules, you have every chance for the first and subsequent dates.
Invitation to the cinema or for a cup of coffee
This is already a very radical step, and if in previous cases the girl may still doubt your sympathy, then after such an invitation even the most unsuspecting person will suspect that you like her. Choose a cozy coffee shop where you can easily talk. If you are still not sure that because of the feelings that have gripped you, you can conduct a free conversation, then it is better to choose an art cafe where any music groups perform. You can also invite a girl to the cinema for an interesting premiere.
What is not worth saying while meeting?
Pickup communities abound in various ways of dating. Let's be honest - maybe, once, these hackneyed phrases were interesting to someone, but now they cause only a grin.
What is absolutely not worth saying when meeting:
- “I see that you are bored without me. Now I will entertain you, "
- "I know you love hot guys - here I am,"
- “Someone said that you are alone - I’m ready to destroy your loneliness,”
- “What are you doing with me your beauty - I’m beaten, wounded in the heart!”,
- "You are made for love, and I am ready to give it to you,"
- “When I saw you, I felt something that I never felt! You must leave a phone number, or I will die on the spot! ”,
- “I heard one angel escaped from paradise - I won’t tell anyone where you are if you agree to give me your number”,
- "I really like hot things like you - but you are special!",
- “I’m ready to kneel before you, just don’t disappear without a trace!”
These and many similar phrases are ready to destroy even a relatively good impression. Various "I" are especially negatively affected, which are best avoided in great abundance.
How to understand whether a girl likes?
So you are communicating. The girl is certainly very cute and beautiful. You are interested together. How to understand: is it just a pleasant pastime, or do you really like it?
The most commonplace advice is to listen to yourself. If you regularly return thoughts to a new acquaintance, if you are really interested and important about what is happening in her life, then most likely you like her. Also, the following symptoms can speak of sympathy:
- She seems the best among all the girls that you know
- The similarity of interests and views on life,
- Easy communication without inconvenience
- A large number of common topics
- She has a positive effect on you
- The absence of any annoying factors in behavior, appearance and judgment,
- There is a feeling of enthusiasm during communication, meetings and even just the look of this girl,
- You begin to dress much more carefully, use perfume, look better than usual when you know that you will see each other.
If most or all of the items match, yes, you like it. And it's time to admit to her own feelings.
Many modern relationships may look something like this: the two like each other, but are embarrassed to admit. But life would be easier and more interesting for both!
If you can’t decide to confess to a girl, although you assume that feelings can be mutual, then an SMS message can be a way out of the situation. For some girls, this option is even preferable because with “live” recognition, they are often lost and do not know how to react. In the case of a message, the girl will have the opportunity to think about her answer, and approach it carefully. However, subsequently, all important conversations with this girl, if you develop a relationship, it is better to conduct personally, so that she does not have the impression that you are afraid of any serious topics.
Help the girl without hinting at anything in return. Do this as if in passing, as if you had done it for a close relative or friend. Help can be very different. Perhaps she’s late somewhere, and you have the opportunity to give her a lift. It is possible that she has problems with the laptop, and you could repair it and so on.
Let her know that she is the best
This can be done by commenting, for example, on some star (it is better to avoid comparisons with real acquaintances, if they are not the obvious enemies of the girl). For example, she is delighted with some actress - note that you will not understand what she found in her. if she is much more beautiful. Or emphasize her merits: “I have never met a girl who cooks so deliciously”, “You have perfect growth”, “Go crazy, what is your eye color”, “You are so graceful, you must have been doing ballet?” And things like that.
You can say “love” in other words or actions
There are many ways to show your beloved your feelings. If you have a meeting in the cold season, or you work together - grab a glass of her favorite hot drink for her. If he gets sick, offer to bring her medicine or give her fruits (you can also through a friend or courier): "Eat vitamins, get better." Also, with a courier, you can send a bouquet of flowers on any occasion or "Just for the mood." Do not hesitate - such actions are likely to be appreciated.
To gently hint at a relationship, you need
Explain why it is special and you need it
Make it clear that you do not just want a relationship with a girl, but that she is interested in you. Tell us what you like most about her, why you think your couple has a chance for a happy relationship. Tell her about when you first realized that you like him, what exactly you felt. Girls especially like these stories.
Show how a woman is dear to you
It happens that words are not always enough, and many women no longer take words seriously. Therefore, do not neglect actions that could show her your true attitude towards her. Many men have forgotten what it means to “look after” a woman, thereby increasing the “price” of those who still do this.
Bend her to the first kiss
Most women believe that the beginning of a serious relationship is the first date or declaration of love, and the first kiss. If you bring your meeting to the conclusion that it ends with the first kiss (you can do this by saying goodbye by spending your chosen one home), then you could completely get her to you.
Express the desire that you want to see her next
Some women do not understand the hints or do not want to take them seriously, for fear of getting into an awkward position. Usually we are talking about adults, busy women or business women who do not have time to “pick up” your signals. In this case, it is best to say directly about your feelings.
What to do if a girl refuses
In this situation, of course, you need to behave like a man - not arranging scenes, not insulting a girl and not joking about her later in the company of friends. If you behave with dignity in this situation, then perhaps the girl will look at you from a completely different perspective and will soon want to be with such a balanced guy herself. If she refused, then just say: “Well, then the topic is closed.” If you were on friendly terms before, then you don’t need to avoid it now, behave as if nothing had happened, and do not return to this topic even with hints until it itself initiates such a conversation. If you haven’t talked before, then just periodically congratulate her on the social network with Happy New Year, Birthday and March 8, for example. If she has an interest in you, she will somehow let you know.
It's time to admit to the girl that she likes
So, if she definitely likes it, it's time to talk about it. But how? You communicate, walk, you feel good together, but what words to choose to talk about your sympathy? “How do I tell a girl that I like her?” Is a frequent question.
One of the best ways to talk about feelings is to honestly and bluntly say "I like you very much." But, you must admit, courage is not always enough for such a statement, and I would like even such a simple confession to be original and memorable.
You can choose different ways, pick up different phrases. For example:
- Ask her what she considers the cutest. When she answers, tell her: "And for me you are the cutest, because you really like you."
- Ask if she likes ... Well, for example, pizza. In any case, you can say that either “I also like pizza, but I like you even more”, or “Pizza, of course, not really, but you are beautiful!”. It is not necessary to compare with food, but you should not be diligent in the search for original comparisons.
- Create a romantic situation. You can choose a walk in the park, a lake or a pond, a starry night or a beautiful place - such a situation, like recognition, will be remembered for a long time.
- Tell her she is special to you. It may be the phrase “I have never met girls like you. And maybe for someone you are ordinary, but for me you are special. I like you very much. ”
- Give her compliments - they must be sincere and come from the heart, from the heart. It could be, “You are unusually sweet, you have such an amazing smile. I like everything about you, and you like it very much. ”
- Solve any lady problem. At the same time, it is not necessary to create it yourself. Firstly, you will show yourself to be a person you can always rely on, and secondly, you can tell her that she is extraordinary and you are ready to continue your communication more closely.
In any case, remember: recognition in one’s own feelings should always be sincere and not be voiced for the sake of one’s own selfish interests. Yes, the answer will not always be mutual, but this is not a reason to be afraid of further relations. Pure feelings are always very expensive.
However, you can not tell her directly about feelings, but give a hint to a girl about sympathy, but in such a way that there is no way to understand the hint. Create the most romantic atmosphere, and she will begin to understand.
What and how can I write, to put it in words, no courage?
She really likes the girl, but there is no way to admit to her personally - too much embarrassment, fear of rejection or any other reasons. What to do in this case? Should she write about it.
But how to write? What words to choose? What if she doesn’t understand? In the age of technology, both mobile messengers and social networks can be suitable for this. A special effect will be produced by your own hand-written plain paper letter. Write to the lady everything you think. It may seem silly and ridiculous, but words coming from the heart always differ from those made up by someone. If you write poetry, then it's time to devote lines to her. If you draw, give her your creation. It is not necessary to send by mail - put it discreetly in a bag or pocket, drop it yourself in the mailbox - just try to make it the recipient.
After all, girls love secrets and adventures - you can send her small messages with tips, and then invite her on a date, where you can tell about your feelings. You can make such messages anonymous - this will foster her interest in your fan. Show fiction and originality - surprise. It is also worth remembering that girls love when there is humor in communication. But do not write standard jokes or highly specialized humor. Write her a funny story from your life, and then casually mention her in person with your chosen one. This will have an effect on her, be sure.
What exactly should she write? Avoid template phrases, be interesting and sincere, describe what you like about her, why she makes you feel like that. Be romantic.
Other ways to hint a girl that she likes
Girls understand hints quite well and feel sympathy for their person. Not all, of course, but most. Therefore, if you do not have the courage to say or write to her directly - hint. There are a lot of opportunities. For example:
- Treat her with something delicious. It will be good if you can find out what exactly she loves,
- Help her - bring a bag, make a report, prepare a task,
- Always listen carefully to her, keep up the conversation,
- Just support her
- Laugh with her jokes
- Help with solving her problems
- Talk more about her, not only to her, but also in general companies,
- Emphasize her strengths - “You have so admirably defended your work - few would have been able to,”
- Take an interest in her life.
In any case, increased attention to her person will make the girl think about what this is connected with, and, of course, she will think about your sympathy. But do not be too intrusive - if she has the feeling that she is being persecuted and not allowed to “breathe”, there can be no further discussion. Therefore, be near, but do not overwhelm your entire existence. There are many ways, explicit and implicit, to tell a girl that I like her. An even greater number of ways - how to hint a girl that she is cute. It all depends on the imagination and what exactly you are ready to do so that she finds out about it.
It is also worth saying a few words about failures and non-reciprocal sympathy. There are situations when you say to a person “I love you” or “I really like you” and hear in response that these feelings of love or sympathy are not mutual. For many, this becomes a major shock - there is a fear that in the future any recognition or communication will end in the same way. And it is very difficult to deal with this uncertainty, especially if you primarily remember the experience of negative experience.
Say to yourself: "I can." Say: "I am brave, and I have nothing to fear, no one is obliged to like anyone." Do not prepare for the worst, always believe in the best.
In the end, the light did not converge on one female. Wait a bit, feelings will subside. Then look around you surrounded by many beautiful other girls!
Girls are very attached to feelings and emotions, diversity and ease of communication are very important to them. Surprise, do not get lost, and everything will turn out!